hmmm...i know the truth its not easy to teach someone that u close...sometimes you had a courage to deal with it....hmm..i learn that today and keep to myself as reminder...what ever it is i love him....but sometimes he dont wanna hear what i want he to hear....ya....girls are not really straightforward when they do something.....

now i realize when u grow to be an adult there are a lot of thing that u need to think and need to be consider....i wonder why??? i have to face this kind of thing...but deep inside in my heart i know it is called as responsibility.....hmmmm...but there also lot of think that i really didnt clear it myself...im not only have to think about my future job, but also i have to think about my family, my lover, my responsilibility as daughter....n more n more....until at one point i wish i can stop a time and settle the thing that really important and then comes to the other....huhuhu..but i cant do that....wawawawawawa....i think i have quite a huge responsibility...and my lover want us to get married asap...i know i wanted to..but i have money constraints....at least before married i have to but a family car and even a house for them so my parent can be relax and have a bigger house....but i also wanna have a saving for my wedding...coz i wanna make my wedding to the best as i could where non of my friend and family would complain about it...wa...i donno whether i can make it or not..i hope i det a good job with a good salary and the most important thing is i can perform well in anything that i do...

damn it..............can even for once u didnt make me mad on u....u noe what im not coming from da family that kind of having a lot of money...when it comes to the moment that i dont have money...i wont eat...u noe...u have brain but u dont noe how to use it....u just think of urself....im really mad today.....seriously....even i cant hold myself rite now...Ya Allah kau pinjamkn aku ketengangan yg kau ada Ya Allah...pinjamkn aku kesabaranmu Ya Allah....

hell ya...u know what i made mistake again...again n again...why everytym i let my emotion to control me again...i dunno it is because the tiriod that im having rite know or pms or it is me that having prob...hmmmm....yesterday...i mad to k.ju..i know she also mad at me...bcoz i can feel the lihe she wont smile at me da way she used to be...im doom...im made mistake again...i know my mistake..its not a big deal actually im just mad bcoz she keep laughing and distract me since she sit besides me....hmmmmmmmmmm.....i dunno how to explain....i hope she not mad yet...im sorry...im really means that..."terlajak perahu bole diundur terlajak kate bdn binasa"......but i just mad yesterday but now all the madness was gone...am i too sensitive..i dunno i didnt get the answer.....even not a word....speechless..............................................................................................

happy b'day...sweet-22 to myself..huhuhu..im getting older..no...not older..but im getting mature...so supposedly i hope i can handle myself better since im 22 now...n i wish i know how to react as adult n to be reasonable in anything that i do....happy b'day syuhadah..happy b'day to urself..ur parent n sibling now they r at kg coz ada kenduri arwah...so they may be can wish 4 u...but its ok...i dont mind...but im quite sad also..since my bf forget my b'day...he didnt even call me..or text me...to wish my bday....how sad is that...."sesungguhnya sabar separuh dari iman"...be smile 4 urself n chillout.....yeah....i think on monday i want to but present for myself..hehehe....my friend also didnt wish for me..huhuhu...as usual not many person will remember ur b'day or none of them remember ur b'day..huhuhu.....but k.su have wish for me...n buy a berger...so sweet...n i get bruch frm her...thx ya...thx a lot...

penah x korg tgk movie ni..aku mlm td nk study tp aku ngntok jer...so aku pon tgk la cite ni...cite ni pasal Holly yg kematian husband die Gerry...she really loving him n once her husband gone she like lose control on herself.....tym tgk cite ni aku byk nangis coz i know how it feel if we losing the person that u love so much....i can even think if i lose my amin..his a part from me..he stand here in my heart....a part of my body, my thought n everything...i know s/times i being rude with him coz i cant control da way i should talk with him...but i do love him for entire of mylife...as i love my family...i cant lose him...i dont know what i should do if he's not here besides me..talking to me..hold my hand..hug me when i sad...being my shoulder when i cry...he everything to me....i can let him go..not for my entire life.....my love on him more than i can tell him....its same with holly that love gerry so much.. after gerry die she can c him anywhere she go...dat situation happen to me to...even when he not around...i can even smell him....hear what he said...and etc...he is part of me....part of my breath...any many other thing......P.S I LOVE YOU...means a lot to me...coz i doesnt want to lose him...

hahahaha...aku ada satu cite best hari ni...aku dh lame x bke blog batch aku kt klj.....so aku pon bke la blog 2 hari ni....aku ingat ada PENDENGKI yg nm mee bandung 2 dh musnah tp dia hidup jgk lg..mcm2 la dia kutuk majlis batch ktorg 2.....mmg truk betol org 2...mcm nk siat2 je mulut n tgn die yg taip bkn2 2.....np ada org yg x tau nk hormat org ln...ske hati la kami nk wat per....we r enjoy ourself in this event...y u r keep buzzing us...bengong sungguh la.....np la ada manusia mcm 2....kalo aku jmpe sah2 aku karate die.....dush2.....hangin aku bile bc pe dia taip kt cbox blog 2.....

today...i wondering..i had alot of asaignment dat had to be done...n u know what im doing...i've been looking 4 my old friend since i high school...i miss them n wonder what they doing rite now...its been 7 years i nvr have a chance to talk to them...to know the latest of their story...cz everybdy has chosen thier own way since we enter into form4...ya...dat what a life its all about...when s/times u r looking outsides the box or choose to go back to where u belong n starting moving out...u will / may be lost contct with ur friend...or they tend to ignore u....i've meet a few friend..the old friend of mine....when we start seeing each other for 2-3 years before...we contct each other..chatting...n when they know where i've been studying n etc...they tend to go far away from me...dat y s/times i didnt want to tell them where i've been studying..what course dat i've been taken...b'coz i hate when they juz keep quite and starting to ignore me...its hurting ok.....although not all of them like dat.....i juz want they know..no matter high level u r...u should look down...b'coz dat will make u know urself better....n realize who u really are.....

hummm....tetibe teringat hari ni..one of my friend said that she dont like da left handed person coz they cant take the other advice...i am da left handed person so she was talking in front of me for several tym..i think she pointed at me...am i dat bad...its not like i doesnt want to accept the other opinion..but sometimes if the opinion doesnt come into my logical thinking...i hard for me to accept..but im still reasonable person...dat y when i hang out with other of my friend..my best friend...i tend to listen 1st before i speak...especially when i mad...i think not all da left handed person was stubborn or etc...may b i was da one who stubborn or da one dat cant take the other advise but the other left handed will not hv da same kind of attitude like me..but for me..when she made that statement she should think 1st..because she not close enough to me..to know me well...and i also never judge her coz 4 me..she was nice and easy going person but s/times i can feel that da way she talk to me its diff compare when she talk to other friend..but its ok...i tend to manage my feeling with that...ya...when i think bout what she had said...she might be right...coz we cant judge our ownself...n i accept what she said as advice dat i should change some of my attitude..coz its hard to make everybdy to like u...to comfortable and be friend with u....hehehe....

besides that....im also quite talkative person n its only happen to the person that i know well..but i also know s/times...it will make the other people think im really2 anoyed...heheheh....i know im not good enough even s/times i told myself...do not talk to much...cz i d/n want to be a person with empty tin...hehehehe